Monday, August 9, 2010

exhausted

I feel like I'm a prisoner in my own home. I'm woken up way early to babysit. Take the kids a shower, get them dressed. After my grandma finishes cooking, I feed them and if I feel like eating what she cooked, then I eat. Then after that I usually have to wash the dishes, clean the stove, and mop the house before my mom gets home bc if not she'll completely freak out and start screaming at me, which I try to avoid. When she gets here, she doesn't say hi to me, just to my brother and sister. Doesn't say a word to me. Then, after a while, she yells at me because of something I did wrong or because I didn't clean my room or something. OH YEAH, like I have a whole bunch of time taking care of YOUR kids to do my own shit. After that she doesn't leave me alone. Do this, do that, don't forget to do this even before I even finished doing the first thing you told me to do. I don't go out. FOR NO REASON. Today, my friends invited me for some pizza, called her to ask her, she said, "Oh, I have to do this and that after I get off from work and there's no one to take care of the kids." I just asked her why does she do these things to me and she said," I don't know." SO apparently, she's doing this crap on purpose because she knows what shes doing. So I'm stuck in the house ALL DAY LONG, catering to her needs. She doesn't wash her plates purposely just so when I'm done eating I have to wash mine and hers because if I leave hers there she throws a fit. Another thing if I eat, she constantly tells me,"you're gonna get fat," "you look like a cow," "you're not gonna be able to walk through doors." This and that. Leave me alone! If I want your opinions, I would ask you! I go through this every single day! On Sunday, she doesn't work. But NO. She spends the whole morning/some of the afternoon out doing whatever it is. Nails, hair, whatever..never spends the only day she has off home..always has something to do. It's not even like I'm a bad kid. If it's grades she cares about well then I get good grades what else do you want? What can I do to satisfy you? How better can I be? I really can't wait till I go to college and have some time to myself and meet new people and get away from this town from everyone. This school year better go by quickly.

-stuck inside this house
-occasional meals
-clean everyday
-no time for myself
-i do everything wrong
-total disappointnment

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thank you for reading! I will visit you back!