Friday, January 28, 2011

starting monday, february 1st, i believe, i would begin my weight loss! working out, eating healthy, taking my pills too :/. yeeeeess! i will not fail!

-excuse the grammatical/spelling errors. i am on my cellular device.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

coming to terms with the fact that I'm actually single.

actually. As in, seriously.
As in I'm not with somebody, but somehow I feel like I'm betraying that one person.
I don't feel like that anymore.
Somewhat ironic, though.
Just the other day I was asking myself stupid questions about you that I didn't know the answer to.
I still don't know the answer to 'em.
But hey. I'm just trying to move onnnnnnnnn.
Is that so bad?

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

so damn beyootiFUL

you remember this?

Monday, January 24, 2011


He's my monkey and I'm his koala.
Because koalas sleep an average of
22 hours a day.
Kind of like I do.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

don't underestimate the things that I would do

OKAY can I just say I LOVE THIS NEW DESIGN/TEMPLATE/NEW LOOK?! It's so beautiful, it's so me, Ah! This is soo exciting!

My cousin, who I haven't seen in about 9 years came from NY yesterday. I'm pretty sure he's staying with us, if not living here. Okay so, I don't want to beat around the bush, I think he's gay. He doesn't look feminine or talk feminine but he acts kind of fragile-like. And he came with his 'friend' yesterday, and his 'friend' was definitely gay, obvious gay, no-doubt gay. After he brought all his luggage he went downstairs (I guess to say bye to his friend), but he stayed in the car for like 15 minutes and the windows were blacked out so I really couldn't see anything.

Yesterday, I really did NOT want my mom to be suspicious or anything because she's the worst homophobe ever. But, today, she came in my room and whispered to me, 'don't you think he's a little gay-ish' and I just nodded. I guess that rat's outta the cage! Hopefully, she doesn't turn against him or anything.
I need to find something to wear for tomorrow.
I think I might just watch movies all night.
Because I slept all day.
I might watch: the wall street movie w/ Shia :D

only because I love this song

Monday, January 17, 2011

horrible day today

mixed signals

so im laying on my grandma's bed watching the cheetah girls, the last movie which I haven't even seen. I remember when like it was yesterday when I got the cheetah girls CD for the first movie, I got it for christmas! I probably still remember those cheesy lyrics, O God! and I just got into an argument with my friend. Great. Its times like this when I miss you. But I don't even know why I bother missing you, if when I simply try talking to you to straighten things out, I get attacked pretty much. And I'm sorry for texting you that night & for whatever else it is I did. To be honest, I don't like blogging about you because idk I just always end up regretting it.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

you had my heart inside of your hands, and you played it to the beat

I need this CD when it's released. She's beyond amazing.

music never fails me

i can't believe i still remember what happened

Before I even went out , I burned myself with the flat/curling iron and now I have this huge dark spot on my forehead. Though, it could be worse, I'm glad I iced it for soooo long so it didn't blister as much as it was supposed to. I really couldn't find anything at all to wear so I just ended up wearing some blue leggings with a vertical-stripe shirt and a cute jean jacket over it. I didn't get to leave home til like 9 almost 10 and by that time the party wasn't even started.

I got there and as soon as I got there I was pretty much welcomed by a shot. Not cute because I wasn't expecting that.

I hate when people try to make me jealous and it's obvious you're doing it. Besides that, I hate competing with a girl over a guy because I'm not desperate and it's not like the guy is a god or anything. So yeah, after I got there then others came and the party got really started. So he came and, of course, she was all over him. The funny thing is is that I could feel her looking at me while she was over him like she wants me to look at her or something. I did not look at her. Why give her the benefit? Lolol people are funny! Anyways, after she left to the kitchen or somewhere, he came right over and he's pretty tall but somehow he was inches away from my face and asked why I didn't come by him to talk to him. LOL! Do I look like a groupie kid? I just said why didn't he come by and talk to me? You want something, you get it. Nice concept, huh?

Okay so fast forward to when I was tipsy! And yes I was tipsy just tipsy, even though I was drinking straight ciroc, the coconut one. Which wasn't bad but the others didn't like it so much. Soo glad there wasn't any beer because I hate beer because it's disgusting. So by this time, I really didn't give an eff about that guy or her. Lol, you won girly, I'm not desperate. I was dancing and having a great time, I'm surprised I still remember.

So I had to go home early because my ride was going to start drinking and so I wanted to avoid anything from happening. And when I left, the party got reeeeally started. I heard some guy say 'the high school kids have to leave' and it was true lol, we had rides which were gonna get drunk now.

I was sooooooooo gone. I almost busted my ass going down the steps and I was laughing my ass off at my friend (she was drunk & gonnne) throwing snow at my other friend. I have no idea how I found this hilarious but it was the funniest thing to me.

When I got home, I drunk text which sucks because I do it all the time. I texted 2 people, best guy friend and this other guy. My best guy friend was being a bitch to me for noooo reason and I wasn't even doing anything. And he's gonna text me this morning talking about 'are you feeling better?' STFU. The other guy I texted was taking advantage of my drunkenness because he kept asking he how much I liked him and if he wanted to get serious when I told him a thousand times that I don't want to get serious with anybody. Hmm he thought I was really thaaat drunk. But besides that, he was being cute, he's already calling me 'babe' and I haven't been called that in a long time. I probably said some things I shouldn't have and I guess I would have to deal with those some other time.

I got hungry and I didn't wanna puke, but I ended up eating. And I got sooo tired so quick but I couldn't lay down because my head was spinning. But after I sobered up a little I fell asleep.

And that was my grrreaat night!

Friday, January 14, 2011

AP English bitches

How moronic must a being be? Actually, it's so ludicrous, it's laughable!!! I'm going to write, extracting all pretentious aspects of my life.

I'm enraged. No, not because of what's apparent, but, in fact at what's ambiguous. I wish I could just tear down the expanse along with the shackles and just sit and scrutinize, you know? Laugh at the ludicrous-ness, if that's a word. "Hmmm," I would say,"is this really authentic?" Of course, it would not be, as I tell myself, but sometimes you just don't want to know. And, perhaps, I might be held accountable for not seeking actuality. But, I live in my own little world, with happiness, perfection, and with two veils covering the side of my eyes, very much like horses. It very well is perfect, and happy but it's the farthest from factual.

I'm not going to dwell over whether or not what I write creates envy, or making others meta-morph into a 'green-eyed monster.'No. I should practice what I preach and search for things that are beneficial and that are actually concrete!

Like Daniel said, "you're looking in the wrong places." The weirdest people you would never EVER guess are the best philosophers. And I found this out today.

you gotta turn the vocab gene on sometime.


Class neeeeds to END! I love this phone lol <3

Thursday, January 13, 2011

i am tooooo broke

to get drunk on Saturday. Lolol idk what I'm gonna do, still gonna party though.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

i don't get it.

what is it that you want?

Tuesday, January 11, 2011


i know i can't take one more step towards you; cause all thats waiting is regret; don't you know i'm not your ghost anymore; you lost the love i loved the most.

who do you think you are? runnin' 'round leaving scars; collecting a jar of hearts; tearing love apart; you're gonna catch a cold; from the ice inside your soul; don't come back for me; who do you think you are?

Monday, January 10, 2011


So, I ended up not doing the essay, or the project. Lol, the essay was a part of a test that I had today, I had a 60 on the test, multiple choice only. It didn't change my grade, not one bit. I had an 89 on that class and I still do. Of course, the essay could help me get a better grade, but EH. I am lazy. The project, WHICH I DONT UNDERSTAND AT ALL :), is due Wednesday. It's gonna snow 8-10 inches added to what's already accumulated. But, he's going to go over what we have to do for the project, so I won't have to rely on the snow to save me. I applied for FAFSA, still waiting on the results. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS I also have to be a good girl this week because there's a party on Saturday and I don't want to get in trouble with my mom *thumbs up* I'm gonna finish watching Salt, and after this:

So, because my birthday is the 22nd of September, I don't know if I fall under a Virgo or a Libra. When, I read Virgo horoscopes, I don't feel like it's me. So maybe I should read Libra horoscopes WHO KNOWS?

OH AND AUBURN IS FREAKIN NUMBER 1. WHERE WAS I? SINCE WHEN? This football season I've been kinda in the air because I barely watched games and stuff. Oh well.

Sunday, January 9, 2011


i looooooooooooooooooooove thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis
I feel like I'm in a fucking relationship with my friend.
WTF is this ?!?!?!?

Saturday, January 8, 2011

did you kill him, too?!?!?

to the max yo!
I have an essay type thing & a project that I need to do in a day. G r e a t n e s s, ain't it? I'm like seriously done with school.
I'm seriously failing (pretty much) probability & statistics, ugh!
Oh and I want to seeeeeeeeeeeeee black swan!
Oh and I need to exercise.
because prom seems so long from now, but the months are gonna come flying.
I hate these short blogs...I have nothing to say lololol

Monday, January 3, 2011


Ah, the wonders of having a 3G cellular device:
-i get to blog in track


What do I want? Someone to appreciate me. And to make me laugh SO IM NOT FUcKEN BORED ALL THE TIME. After all, I've learned not to expect anything from anyone, and expect everything from myself. #truestory

Sunday, January 2, 2011

they're growing on me

their accccccccccents. I checked to see if there are any tickets around the tri state area but noooo, only in Europe. GRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

it's 5:25

why do i always have to play hard to get?
stupid, stupid.